I have seen many different questions on the internet lately about forgjveness. One of the main questions is this one: "If I don't want to communicate with some does that mean I haven't forgiven them?" I understand some of where this question comes from and I have had someone tell me that if I didn't talk to my father then I didn't truely forgiven him. Sure I have forgiven him, but that doesn't mean I need to have a communication/relationship with him because he did do things that were wrong, and still does. You can forgive someone and not have to have that person in your life. I have forgiven my rapist, but does that mean I need to have a communication with him...of course not.
When we forgive, we don't say that whatever the person did to us was acceptable or that it was okay, we just forgive them for what they did. Forgiveness and communication/relationships dont always go hand in hand...communication/relationships need forgiveness, but forgiveness does not need communication/relationships.
1 comment:
Yet another reason that I know you are a better person than I will ever be! Ok, a couple reasons. A) I cannot forgive Mark for what he did to me in our past relationship and I probably never will. B) I could NEVER EVER EVER forgive someone who raped me! I would know it was not MY fault but someone elses and to violate me like that, well, I just do not have the right kind of heart or head to be able to forgive someone for something like that. However, if you would constitute forgiveness in my being able to let them live to see their next birthday, than MAYBE my not killing them would constitute forgiveness if I were in such a situation, but even then I don't know that I would be able to NOT inflict serious bodily injury on my attacker if I EVER saw that person again!
You are a better person because you have the abilty to forgive someone such a MAJOR deciet (or sorts). I honestly wish that I was able to do something like that but I would find it impossible. Anyone who is able to forgive their rapist, in my eyes, is an incredibly strong, amazing person who is more than worthy of my full respect! Just thought I would let you know that!
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