Blah

Lately I have been feeling great, but today I feel kinda blah like I don't want to do anything, even read my Bible. I think I am thinking and worring too much about tomorrow in which I am going to get my drivers license...I know it's about time right? For the past couple of week I have been doing good with reading my Bible, and I haven't done it yet today and I am slightly ashamed of myself.

I know while I am doing other things such as writing this I could be reading my Bible, or I could have read it when I first woke up, but I don't have the desire to read it. Part of me wonders if that makes me a terrible, horrible Christian or normal. I know other Christians go through a time when they don't have the desire to read, write, or pray to God. But I wonder how do they over come it? I remember a few weeks ago that I was just telling Todd to just do it and it would get easier and not seem like a chore, which is probably what I should do huh? I should just read it and fight off this feeling.

I think sometimes we need to go through these periods to see if we are truly dedicated to reading and praying even when the desire is gone and the ambition isn't there. I was just reading my friend Jeremy's blog and he said he was going to get back to doing something he loved to do which was writing, and it got me thinking. I love reading my Bible, so why should I let anything stop me? Just like he shouldn't let anything stop him. I think that is what I am going to do...I am just going to read my Bible and prove that I am dedicated and strong enough to push past this blah like feeling.

Words

As you know I have been reading through the book The Five Love Languages. Dr. Chapman goes through the different lanugages of love and how they make a difference in our relationships. One of the languages was words. I have finished the book about two weeks ago, but I have still be thinking about it and how some if not all of them could relate to God and how we show God's love to others.

Of course our words to others are important. I think no matter what simply saying "I appreciate you" goes a long way. I know how important it is to hear someone say they need you or love you as well. The same would go for God. God wants to hear us speaking of our love for him. Of course we can say we love God to other Christians, but not say a word about him to non-Christians..what does that show about our love for God?

I think part of witnessing is showing our love for God (well duh right) but I don't think witnessing is just telling friends about God, but saying things like "Well I love God and I want to make him happy so I won't do that..." or whatever. Our words can be so incredibly powerful no matter who we are talking about. Shouldn't we constantly say I love God just as much as we would say I love steak or some other thing. We tend to be quick to say I love mundane things yet its so hard to say I love God.

We need to get away from keeping our love for God a secret and work towards shouting from the rooftops...I LOVE GOD!

Christlike Quality

As some of you know, Todd and I have been reading through The Purpose Driven Life together. Granted there are times when we don't read because we get preoccupied with other things, though we are trying to become more disciplined in reading it more often. If you have read the book before, you know there are questions at the end of each chapter. The question for chapter 26 got me thinking.

What Christlike character quality can I develop by defeating the most common temptation I face? Throughout the chapter Rick Warren talked about how our temptations could make us grow closer to God. The thing is I am finding a hard time trying to answer that question. I think one of the qualities I can develop through my temptations is patience. I have found lately that I get aggravated with some people to quickly. I see that I have been getting better at being patient with mainly those I love.

I see the people I have the least patience with is my family, and that really does bother me. Patience is one of the fruits of the spirits and I would love to develop it more. Rick Warren said: God uses the opposite situation of each fruit to allow us a choice. I have decided when I find myself starting to get aggravated, I'm of course going to stop and pray to God for help, the strength to not get aggravated and angry, but to have patience with those I love, because I don't think getting angry and aggravated with each other shows that I do love them deeply.

What are some of the temptations in your life, that can help you develop Christlike character qualities? How can you grow in Christ because of your temptations?

My Lunch

Pastor Paul gave a moving sermon on Sunday about giving "your lunch" to Jesus. He talked about the feeding of the five hundred and mention that at some point the little boy who had the fish and bread had to give them to Jesus. The young boy sacrificed his lunch for Jesus, something that gave him nourishment. The young boy sacrificed his food, his life force for Jesus with the faith that Jesus could feed not only him, but the five thousand men in the crowd. Are we that willing to give something to God in order that he could bless others? Years ago Pastor started YES Camp in hopes of providing something to less fortunate children. This past year Yes Camp had 100 campers, the second highest. If pastor didn't give his lunch: his time, efforts, and sometimes money to Jesus for the use of Camp, the thousands of kids that came to God as a result of camp wouldn't have.

Too often we are reluctant to give anything in the name of Jesus. We are reluctant to give our money thinking the pastor is the one who gets it, when in reality the church needs tithes to function. Many churches fail as a result of the congregation not tithing! That should not be happening.

I am sitting here thinking of what can I do for my church, what can I give so that God could bless others through my givings. Right now I can't tithe as I have no job, but when I can I do. I give my time to the ladies fund-raisers and other things the church does, and many other things. I don't do them for my own glory, but for the glory of God so that our church could reach out to others and provide services that are needed within the community such as a nursery school, Celebrate Recovery, and a Cancer Support Group (which I decided to name after this blog).

What are you willing to give to Jesus? Are you willing to give your lunch so to speak? We need to band together and use our talents, money, and more to help the church of God to expand no matter what church we go to. It doesn't matter if you are catholic, presbyterian, methodist, pentecostal, baptist, or non-traditional such as ROL. When we give to God in faith, we give to God together for one purpose. So give your lunch, give your time....give yourself to God.

That Little Voice

We all know it, we've all heard it. That little voice telling you to do something you wouldn't think of doing. It could be as simple as "why not send the woman in the hospital a card" or "I should go visit..." Then it could be as complex as "Pray for him" "Pray with him." Normally I get the little voice telling me to do things I see as simple like welcoming a visitor to church or giving a friend a call or something like that. But last night...it was different....

Last night was the fourth night of the Bethlehem Baptist Tent Revival. The Baptist church here in town has an annual revival with pastors from the area giving a different sermon each night. Pastor Paul had a powerful message on Monday about faith...but last night...had impact. Reverend Davis the host pastor gave his testimony..I admit there were times when I cried. He mentioned a scripture that helped him at one point: Psalm 137 the little voice said: Write that down...it is needed. Then as the service was coming to a close, Rev. Davis was still talking it felt like my heart was talking to me. Saying "Pray for Todd. DO IT." I tried to fight it and say I'll talk to him then pray on Sunday if he's ok with me mentioning things. But the little voice kept saying "Do it." and it just got stronger as the time went.

It is times like that when I know that little voice is God telling me to do something. People who haven't experienced the voice or rather God's voice think that it's their subconscience telling them to do something even the small things, but it's not...It's God. I know God was telling me to pray for Todd, and he wanted me to pray with Pastor Paul not the other two for some reason. I know the reason, but I am not going into details on this blog out of respect for both Todd, and Pastor.

But the point is the voice was so strong, I have never felt anything stronger other than the day I accepted Jesus into my life. Even then it was different there was more urgency. No matter how the voice sounds we need to listen to it. We may think it is nothing, but it could be God telling you to do something, he could have a reason why he wants you to call someone. Listen to the voice...listen to God.

One Touch

I was actually thinking of writing about something completely different today, but I have been listening to Christian music more than I normally do lately, mainly because I would rather listen to that than the secular stuff. But there is one song that has been really standing out to much recently because it has so much meaning behind it and it's just so powerful. It's called One Touch by Nicole C Mullen: the young woman who sings "My Redeemer Lives." She sings it from the point of view of the woman who had so much faith that thought if she simply touched the hem of Jesus' robe she would be healed.

This is the chorus:

If I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'd be made whole
If I could just press my way through this madness
His love would heal my soul
If only one touch

It has really made me think. This woman had so much faith that she just wanted to touch the end of his robe. She felt even the bottom of his robe, which probably dragged across the dirt etc would hold enough power to heal her of her ailments. She had so much faith in God, she didn't think he would even notice if she reached out to touch him.

I know there has been times when I felt that same way. If I could just touch him and feel his power I would be healed. If I had enough faith in his power and mercy I would be healed. I think that is the exact basis of faith. Trusting in God when something seems impossible, well even the Bible says With God all things are possible. So why should we doubt his power? Why should we doubt the power of God? I know there are people out there who do doubt the power he holds. If a woman could be healed by touching his robe, if I could be healed simply through faith, prayer (and well medical stuff) how could we not accept the power that God holds?

We all go through a time of "madness" as the song says. We all need to push through and reach out to try and touch the hem of his garment to get even the smallest glimpse of the power that Jesus holds. Sometimes I find it hard how some people cannot believe in Jesus with everything around them; but that's just me ^_^.

Patience

For the past few months Todd has been graciously teaching me how to drive. He has been so incredibly patient with me as well. I think once I accidentally hit the bank of the road when turning into the church parking lot, and he's really good when I panic on the high way, he talks very softly to me to bring the panic down. He remains patient no matter what is going on while I am driving. The same goes with when he is teaching me how to play tennis. Yes is his teaching me many different things ^_^

I mentions Todd's patience with me because it makes me think of how we need to be patient with each other through the different aspects of life. We all make mistakes and not one of us is perfect. We need to be patient and understand that no one is going to be the exact way we want them to be.

Throughout everything we do God is patient with us. We walk away from him, and he patiently calls us back, we struggle with sin and he patiently helps us grow stronger against it. He is patient when we don't learn lessons, when we struggle with witnessing and tithing. God never once losses his patience with us, so why should we lose patience with each other?

How can we exact each other to do things the same way at the same pace that we do things? We are all different. I have a friend who never learns her lesson when it comes to the kind of men she dates, but still I talk to her, give her Godly advice and pray she changes, then she'll call with the same problem. I try to have patience with her as she learns which is what God does with us. He keeps giving us trials and tribulations to teach us things and he is patient when we don't learn right away.

God give us patience and many times we even get impatient with him! We want everything in our time and get upset if it doesn't come when we want it. I think when we learn to be patient with each other more, we can learn to be patient with God and trust him more.

God's Love

The Bible constantly talks about how God's love shines so bright. It talks about his love being the greatest thing we can experience, yet we don't have the capacity to comprehend the greatness of his love. We know God's love is great because he sent his son to die on the cross for us, but do we realize how bright his love is and how wonderful it is?

Job's friend Bildad tried to explain God's love and glory by simply saying that "God is so glorious that even the moon and the stars scarcely shine compared to him." He is saying that when compared to God's love and glory even the moon, stars, and sun above seem dim and dull. Nothing can measure up to God's love not even the brightest things we can comprehend. Everything in God's creation, even the moon and stars know of his glory and bow before him.

Shouldn't we be trying to show that kind of love and glory through our actions? I already talked about how our words can show God's love, but our actions can do the same. God's glory can radiate through how we act and how we treat others and the things that we do in life. We could never measure up to the glory of God, the most we can do is show his glory through our own lives, yet it still won't seem to be enough.

Tithing

Some people believe tithing is just an Old Testament subject and doesn't apply to the New Testament or today's society. People all have their reasons as of to why they don't tithe as the Bible says. One of the biggest reasons is "I can't afford it." It is too hard for people to part with their money. Others think that their tithes go straight to the pastor, which it doesn't. Many times the money people tithe goes to help keep the church running. It pays bills like gas, electric and sometimes the mortgage.

"If you are really eager to give, it isn't important how much you are able to give. God wants you to give what you have, not what you don't have. Of course, I don't mean you should give so much that you suffer from having too little. I only mean that there should be some equality." 2 Corinthians 8: 12-13. God wants us to give what we can, but not to the point where our bills and comfort suffer. If God gives you 100 dollars all he asks is for 10 back, that's not too much to ask from us. God doesn't want all of our money or a huge chunk. Thinking about it 10% of what we make and own isn't a lot. When you give back to God He will provide what you need. You will never be in need of the necessary needs: food, clothes, and shelter. God is the great provider.

Sometimes churches need their congregation to tithe and give money to the church in order to survive. It is not some meaningless idea of the Old Testament, it helps us grow closer to God when we give to his church and his people. How else do people think churches function and pay the bills?

The Power Of Words

We all know that our words can make someone feel loved or hurt someone deeply. Our words are so powerful and many other times we don't understand how powerful they can be. They can be misunderstood, misinterpreted and miscommunicated. Many times when things are misunderstood it's when they are written instead of spoken, even with spoken words they can misunderstood. Solomon even knew this when he said "The tongue has the power of life and death." We need to pay attention and think about the things that we are saying. We need to think of how our words can be taken and whether or not they will show the love of God or not. When people know we are Christians they pay attention to the things we do and say. If our words are hurtful, spiteful and damaging what does that show about us? How would that show non-believers the love and grace of God?

That is why gossip is so hurtful and bad. It doesn't show the glory of God when we repeat things about a person that are not good. Or when you say "I heard" or "Jackie told me that..." and more. When we repeat things that are damaging that we HEARD from someone else or even hurtful things we've seen we damage a person's reputation and take a little bit away from the glory of God. We should be saying good thing, encouraging things about everyone around us, even those that we don't get a long with. When someone starts to gossip we need to simply walk away or say I don't want to hear that. I know I've been talking about gossip alot but it's something that everyone needs to really think about.

We also need to think about what we say to our loved ones. It is our words that can hurt them the most. When we were discussing the twelve steps in sunday school, pastor asked who is the person who's criticism hurts the most and generally it is the person we love the most: a spouse, close friend, or family member. I just finished reading a book called The Five Love Languages and Dr. Chapman said that we need to always be saying words of encouragement to our loved ones and kinds words with a kind tone. We can be so hurtful to someone instead of loving. God doesn't want us to be hurting our fellowman. He wants us to display love and kindness and part doing so is through our words. We can cause life or death with what we say. Think about it.

HIding From God

The book of Job has many wonderful scripture that we need to pay attention to and take to heart. So much of what is said can be applied to how we feel and deal with things on a daily basis. Wednesday night Bible studies are always wonderful because we are going through Job, and Pastor Marvin has insight like no other I've heard. In the 22nd chapter (I know I did chapter 23 yesterday) it is actually Eliphaz who says something profound. He tells Job "God is so great -- higher than the heavens, higher than the farthest stars. But you reply, that's why God can't see what I am doing! How can he judge through the thick darkness? For thick clouds swirl about him, and he cannot see us. He is way up there walking on the vault of heaven."

Too often we think that God cannot see the little things that we do. We think that since he is up in heaven he cannot see the "little" sin we commit like if we tell a little fib or something. But sorry to say God sees everything no matter how small we may think it is. I will stress this again God sees everything we do! We cannot hide anything from God. No matter how hard we try God sees it all which is why we need to do what we could to stop the temptations that we tend to fall into. We need to take the measures needed to eliminate sin from our live granted we will never eliminate it all, but there are things we can consciencously fix. telling fibs even if we call it a little white lie is something we can stop, gossiping about other people around us is another. There are things we can easily stop doing in order to purify our hearts and minds so we can focus more on God.

Too often we think that because there are so many people in the world God cannot see everything we do since he is watching Joe Shmoe down the street. Sometimes we think how could he see this little thing when so and so is committing adultry or murders in the world. Again God sees it all. There is no possible way for us to hide anything from God. We shouldn't even try to hide things from God. Imagine if you tried to hide something from your mom or dad while growing up? Did it ever work?? Hardly ever..I know I could never hide anything from my mom, so why should we try to hide from our Heavenly Father?

Being Tested

Too often when we go through a hardship we don't understand why we must go through it. I can remember constantly asking God why. I wanted to know why I had to have cancer, why I had to be so weak and sick. There were times I will admit when it felt like God wasn't there. It was as if I couldn't find him no matter where I looked, but the main thing was I stayed on the path and searched.

In the book of Job he talks about that feeling of loss. In Chapter 23 he states So he will do for me all he has planned. He controls my destiny. No wonder I am so terrified in his presence. What Job was saying is his life was no longer in his control and that was terrifying. When we hear something is wrong somewhere, health, finances, jobs, and more we get terrified because it is no longer in our control. Its hard for us to feel God all around when we are going through so much.

A few verses before that Job also says "When he has tested me like gold in a fire, he will pronounce me innocent." Sometimes when we go through the hard things, God is testing us like gold. The hardships we go through only makes us stronger and strengthens our faith in God. It's hard for us to see that sometimes though. We have a hard time to see that God has a plan for everything and that he is in fact in control of our lives not ourselves.

Hardships are called hardships for a reason. They are hard to go through, but they get easier if we rely on God the whole time.

The Little Things

Throughout the cancer I learned to pay attention to the small things. It's in the small stuff that God really shows himself. I think non-believers want to see big powerful displays not the small little things that they tend to overlook. Recently I was talking with Pastor Marvin about trying to find an audio Bible for his cousin. She needed cassette tapes instead of cds. So I was going to ask my best friend where I could find some or whatever. My birthday was this past Tuesday and my grandma bless her heart thought what she got me was audio Bible encyclopedia. But what she got was audio Bible on cassette! God works in so many little ways. Now I have the old testament to give to Pastor Marvin's cousin, and it was exactly what she needed the cassettes. It was perfect timing and perfect for what she wants and needs.

God knows our exact needs down to the smallest of details. He finds different ways to show us his power and that He knows our needs such as this. Where could anyone find cassette tapes in a day and age of cds and soon mp3 players? Yet my grandma found a set of cassettes. How wonderful is the power of God? Something like that a non-believer wouldn't see as the power of God, but as a coincidence. know what I mean. They won't see it as a wonderful act instead they will keep asking God for a sign that He is there. It is within the little things that we see God the most, so we need to be paying attention to the small things if we want to see God's glory at it's finest.