The other day I posted a short post about doing something very hard, something that took all the strength I had. But it needed to be done. I forgave my rapist. I have come a long way from the horrible night in 2001. Forgiving the man gave me more strength then I thought it would. When I forgave him I wasn’t saying what he did to me was okay, that it didn’t hurt emotionally and well physically, or that it wasn’t wrong. Forgiving him was saying I am taking control over my life again. I am not letting his actions rule me and cause my depressions.
The moment I gave it to God and forgave the man who hurt me the worst way, I felt a relief, a weight being lifted. I felt free for the first time in 9 years. Holding on to that pain, heartache, resentment, and bitterness just took a toll on me. It destroyed me more than I thought it did. It took a hold of my life and only brought me down more. Took control of myself even though I thought I had control of it. But letting go and forgiving the man who raped me…gave me control back.
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