Depression

Depression is a funny little thing: it can come when you least expect it too. It also doesn't take a whole lot for it to rear it's ugly head. Right now I am dealing with my own demons, and there wasn't anything that really brought this on. A guy came to the kiosk and kept asking me out. He wouldn't take no for an answer nor did it matter that I was seeing someone. He just kept asking me to have a drink with him, which really made me uncomfortable and I couldn't really walk away from him seeing how I had to stay at the kiosk, and there were no security guards or anything nearby. The situation with that guy brought on a lot of different feelings from the past. In the past I was violated in the most horrendous way and that has sparked my depression on many different occasions.

Depression just causes so many different things like doubt, worthlessness and other odd feelings that aren't justified. I am trusting God and relying on him for help and strength to get out of this valley, but today it just seems useless. But I have hope. There will be times when things seem useless/hopeless and as if God isn't there, but He is there. Things aren't as hopeless as they seem sometimes. God is there to lift us up and carry us through these hardships. Right now I am feeling lonely, sad (i've cried) and I really don't fully understand why I am feeling this way. I know God is there, and I know I am surrounded by those who love me. It's just the way depression tends to work sometimes...makes you feel things that aren't true..aren't real.